These are the realizations we had that enabled us to grow as people. Use this as a checklist, and guide your son or daughter to each one of these realizations, and they will be on the road to a successful life.
#1 “I have Aspergers”
The first realization is that your Aspergers Teen needs to accept that something is different about them. So many people are in denial about this, and use that denial as a defense mechanism. If your Aspergers teen gets to a point where they feel relatively safe and secure in life, they will be more likely to accept this fact.
In addition, it is kind of hard to change something unless you acknowledge it’s existence. This is a core principle in personal development of any kind. First see the difference, then understand it, then change.
#2 “I have a lot of work to do”
This goes along with #1. In order for your Aspergers teenager to grow into an independent, thriving individual, they need to understand what ares of themselves they need to work on.
#3: “It is alright to have others help me”
So many people with Aspergers think that they need to do everything themselves. They feel like the only way to “prove” to people that they are competent in the world is to take on the entire world alone. When your Aspergers Teen learns how to accept others help, they are now on the road to true transformation.
#4: “Someone has gone through my exact situation, and written down their solutions.”
This was a major realization for us. Most likely within 20 miles of your house exists the greatest treasure in the world. A place where the previous 2,000+ years of history, with all the mistakes that people have made, and their solutions, is stored. It’s called a library. There are some truly transformative books out there, from people who HAVE figured this out. We generally go by this one criteria when choosing books: Has the author experienced it themselves. So for example, if you were looking for someone who had been through all of the issues relating to Aspergers, and then found solutions, then you would look for someone like us 🙂
#5: “If I actually apply these solutions to myself, my life will be infinitely better.”
Reading about procrastination, happiness, getting over anxiety, motivation, etc. is one thing. Your Aspergers Teenager needs to understand that they not only need to read the books (or listen to audiobooks), but they need to APPLY the information they learn. Knowledge is not power. Applied knowledge is.
#6: “I really like doing (interest). I want to do it as a career.”
Your Aspergers Teenager needs to have something that they want to do that is bigger than just playing video games and watching TV all day. Without this critical component of a purpose, they will be content not doing anything with their life. Get them out and engaged in various activities. One will stick.
For me, this came in the form of traveling to other countries (and states in the US), as well as talking to ultra-successful people and starting to read their books. (See #4 and #5)
Some people might think that it is impossible for them to travel right now, or that they cannot find any successful people to talk to. Start with the books, and then follow the 4 Steps To Finding A Transformative Mentor. The people will start to show up.
#7 “I wonder if it is even possible for me to do (interest)”
They have moved onto the second stage of purpose. Now it is not just an idea. Most likely, they will have some books on the subject, and they have started to get on google and research their interest a bit more. Some momentum should be picking up now.
#8 “I can’t do this!”
This is a good thing. Everyone gets to the point where they think they cannot do something. You want to be looking for this. If it has come after they have committed and decided to do something, that means that they are about to breakthrough. What we’ve found is that generally we get really excited about some new topic of growth, then it overwhelms us and we get discouraged.
That moment of discouragement is perfectly pictured in this drawing:
#9: “I did this, what else can I do?”
Once your Aspergers teen proves to themselves that they CAN do something (doesn’t matter what it is), they will immediately ask “What else can I do?”. From there, the journey has really begun.
There will be lots of bumps in this road to learning and transformative growth. One of the best things you can do is get someone besides yourself to teach your child these realizations. They would be more likely to listen.
We’ve done all the work for you in that area, and put together a program designed to get your child to have these exact realizations. You don’t even need to deal with all the frustration and exhaustion that normally comes with getting people with Aspergers to change. We got it all covered.
To take a well deserved break, relax, and let us do the teaching, as well as discover the steps your child needs to understand in order to “get” these realizations, click here.