How do you believe in yourself?

The following is a guest post from Kathy Sheehan:

Hi I’m Kathy Sheehan, I help parents inspire kids to believe in themselves. Danny and Hayden asked me to write a guest blog and this is my third attempt. In the first I listed the seven steps you need to believe in yourself and briefly outlined each one. Danny’s response was, “Kathy our audience is very left brained, so I imagine a lot of “ok how do I do that?” going on when they read this. Could you add a bit more as to HOW to do each step?”

I can be a little oppositional at times so my second draft totally ignored what Danny suggested and went off explaining the first step and the secret to believing in your self in great detail, to which Danny responded, “Honestly, I would combine the two. That way you get both.”

Ok Danny you win! Below you have the seven steps to believe in yourself explained practically AND the secret to believing in yourself too! Let’s go…

There are seven steps to believe in your self (whether you have Aspergers or not the steps are the same) and they are:

Step one– Believe you are loved no matter what

Step two – Expect to make a difference

Step three – Love your body

Step four – Identify your feelings

Step five – Enjoy the mind game

Step six – Vent your thoughts and feelings

Step seven – Easy! Just follow your dreams

The first step is the SECRET to believing in your self.

If you believe you are loved unconditionally, which means you are loved no matter what you think, say or do then you will believe you are worthy of love and you will learn to love yourself unconditionally too.

This love comes from the spiritual part of you that is pure love, wisdom, forgiveness, courage and hope. Each of us have this spiritual essence within us and it has been called many names by different cultures and religions all over the world, some of these words include: inner guide, inner force, inner power, spirit and higher self. It doesn’t matter what we call it, all that matters is that it is real, it is a part of you and that you learn how to use it.

This part of you and I comes from whatever you call the loving creative energy or being in the universe. You have a spark of this loving energy within you. It connects you to the source of love, to other people, other living things and nature. You can feel, imagine and use this pure love in your life whenever you want to and its power is awesome!

If you are open to feeling this love NOW close your eyes, feel your feet on the earth and think about someone you love with all your heart. Someone you are grateful for, someone who makes your life meaningful, take your time, focus on how much love you have for them, do this again with another two people or places or things you love with all your heart…

The love you feel in your heart loves you unconditionally and it’s the SECRET and the first step to believing in yourself, I call it ‘Sparky’! Next time you feel low take a few seconds to feel Sparky in your heart and remind yourself that no matter what you are going through right now you are loved!

Step two – Expect to make a difference

You are important, unique and irreplaceable. You are here on earth to make a difference, there is something you are here to do that no one else can do. You have a purpose every day and a bigger purpose for being here, your life purpose. You are an amazing piece in the jigsaw puzzle of life and you are the only one who can fit in your spot!

Practical tip – Stop now and ask Sparky this question, “What am I here to do?” Listen, see or notice an answer coming into your mind through your intuition or imagination, that’s Sparky answering you. You will hear exactly what you need to hear today.

Step three – Love your body

Your body is exactly right for what you are here to do. If you look after your body it works brilliantly and you feel energetic and amazing. To look after your body you need lots of sleep, healthy food, lots of water to drink, a bit of sun, play and exercise, cuddles, shelter, warmth, clean air to breath and a toilet!

Practical tip – Stop reading again and ask your body, “Does my body need anything now?” Your body will answer you in your imagination, when it does give it what it needs.

Step four – Identify your feelings

Your feelings signal what’s happening with your body and thoughts. All your feelings are important and okay, even the ones that feel bad. Admit your feelings to yourself, express them (but don’t hurt yourself or others) and before, during or after all this, talk to someone you love and trust about how you feel.

Practical tip – Stop again and ask your self, “What am I feeling?” Notice the feelings in your physical body and then notice the feelings in your emotional body or heart. Whatever you feel is okay and normal.

Step five – Enjoy the mind game

Imagine that all of the earth and everything on it is on a big game board and that each of us is a playing piece on the game board of life. Your body moves on the board but instead of rolling a dice you play with your mind. The rules are: 1. You can go anywhere you believe you can 2. You can do anything you believe you can and 3. You can have anything you believe you can.

Practical tip – Stop and ask your self, “What is impossible for me?” Write down the answers you hear in your mind without judging them, once you have a list of ten read them and notice whether your beliefs are limiting your life.

Step six – Vent your feelings and thoughts

Vent means express, share and then let go. Do this with your feelings and do it with your negative thoughts too, especially the ones that limit your possibilities in the mind game of life.

Practical tip – Take the list of your ten impossibilities and decide if you want to let any of them go simply be changing your belief. Release any negative feelings you have about those thoughts too. You do this in whatever way works for you, bash something, go for a run and/or cry your eyes out until the feelings are released.

Step seven – Easy! Just follow your dreams

Yes it really is that easy. You know what you are interested in, you know what you are passionate about and you know what makes your heart sing! Make a difference by following your dreams and doing what you love, after all that’s what you are here for! 

Practical tip – Put your feet on the floor, think of someone you love and focus on feeling Sparky in your heart. Ask Sparky, “What now?” You don’t have to achieve your dream today, you just need to take a step in the direction of your dreams, and take the journey one step at a time.

The seven step journey to believe in yourself is a lot like climbing a mountain and when you understand these steps, take them your self and believe in yourself then your beautiful child will have their very own guide to lead them up their mountain! 

Thanks Danny and Hayden! I believe in you guys!

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