Environments cause tendencies. Write that down and stick it somewhere that you can see it often, because it is a golden rule of life that isn’t often talked about.
What I mean by tendencies is that certain environments have a better chance of causing certain things to happen. A school causes tendencies of learning. A prison, not so much.
Sure, you can work on changing yourself, getting out of Defense Mode, aligning your Influence Circles, Holding The Space, and everything else we teach, but if you aren’t in a proper environment, everything will be much harder, take much longer, and be a lot more frustrating.
So what is an environment exactly? In our world, it’s just a distinction that creates a frame around a set of relationships.
You have the physical environment (the rooms, buildings, cities, etc that you inhabit on a regular basis). In that environment, you make it your environment through your relationship to the various locales that you frequent.
But you also have the external environment of relationships to other people and the culture of the society you live in.
Finally, you have your internal environment. Your thoughts, feelings, biology and physical structures that make up “you”.
And try as you might to get out of Defense Mode or improve your life, if your external environment is full of toxic people that put you down, it will be VERY hard to change.
The environment is creating some nasty tendencies.
This is the true power of changing yourself & others, because just by a simple shift of the environment, we can change the tendencies of people to react a certain way.
We know, for example, that certain tendencies happen in a church environment that do not happen at school. And certain tendencies that happen at home don’t happen at work.
So I ask you, as you operate in your daily environments, what tendencies are being created, both for you and others?
And how can you change those environments to cause tendencies of patience (with yourself and others), love, connectedness and acceptance, instead of separation, hatred, and anxiety?
I’ll leave you with a couple thoughts from our AE+ Support Group: